Category: self-defense

Year of the Gun: First Step, Basic Pistol

Saigh2 Comments

I have written in the past that one should train with any weapon she intends to use for self-defense. In believing this, the only guns I have ever previously owned for self-defense or otherwise has been shotguns, having had some training, mostly informal, in using them. I have shot rifles, but not since my youth. I had never shot a pistol before last weekend other than an Air Soft. Last year I decided that 2009 would be the year I truly trained in guns, got better with shotguns but also got trained in others. Handguns were first, not only because they were the least familiar but because I want to train at AWARE and this year that is all they are offering.

I chose, however, to take an NRA Basic Pistol class in NH first, rather than AWARE’s Basic Pistol, simply because I wanted to do so with my mate. I do not want to have a gun in the house that he does not know, he may well need it to defend himself for while this blog might focus on women’s self-defense, men are crime-victims, even rape victims too, and he is interested in shooting. I could find no available classes near us, so I looked close to where my sister and his mother live so that we could combine trips with family visits and found courses offered at Major Waldron Sportsmen’s Association and signed us up.

This class was led by Evelyn Logan, a sharp outspoken woman with a strong sense of humor and an even stronger belief in self-defense. Or, as she put it, the right to survive, “If someone attacks me, he’s infringing on my right to survive.” Evelyn was very open about being a rape survivor and an attempted rape survivor, “Anyone want to guess why the second was an attempt?” (there are some factual mistakes, like her husband’s last name and I think she’s younger than this indicates). It turns out that Evelyn has taught at AWARE and she was thrilled to hear that I was going to be training there as well.

As there were many instructors working with her, we also got a taste of various reasons people where enthusiastic about shooting handguns. Along with self-defense and tactical some of the instructors did Bullseye and at least one does Cowboy shooting. We also were able to glean information about why some preferred certain guns over others and how that varied, sometimes picking up things that we might not have expected (for instance, because I am most comfortable shooting left-handed despite being right-handed, probably due both to shooting shotgun and a touch of arthritis developing in my right hand, I noted one instructor mention that being left-handed Glock magazine releases pinched his finger…I might not have noticed this as we only got three shots at the end of class in trying different models, but yes, even with three shots I noted a mark which would likely mean much more discomfort after far more shooting so perhaps no Glock for me).

There were moments of sadness for me. Several women actually noted that they were there to “humor” their husband, boyfriend or father. My mate and I joked that if we were not among the first to introduce ourselves he should have said he was there to humor me (although not actually true, and even less so by the end, he really got into it). Some of these same women also began hanging back when we were able to try out different guns and were quick to say they enjoyed shooting the .22s we trained with but the higher calibers were just too much. I am hoping that as they shoot more this might be something they get past. Hearing it made me, tired as I was from switching my hours and many other reasons for having had little sleep that weekend, head back to try out another .45.

I thought the class we well organized and feel I’m well on my way to becoming knowledgeable enough that handguns will be a part of my self-protection arsenal. But, yes, this is a first step and training will be ongoing. I was thrilled to have a teacher such as Evelyn who has such a passion for women’s self-defense and who has actually stopped a rape using a gun. I will undoubtedly train with her more in the future, as I intend to take more classes at MWSA and she has said she’d try to volunteer when I do. Along with the AWARE classes, the first of which I hope will be next month, I intend to do Persona Protection in the Home, Basic Shotgun (because you never can learn too much) and Basic Rifle at MWSA. I hope, too, to eventually be able to get down to some of their monthly Tactical shoots. It’s good to see a range such as this one with such a great focus on defensive shooting, when most I found closer to me seem focused almost exclusively on shooting sports.

If you are in the region and looking for training in guns for self-defense and/or sport, I do recommend MWSA. Hopefully, if you’re looking for self-defense inspiration, you’ll get to meet Evelyn as one of your instructors.

(For the Second Step: Responsible Use of Lethal Force and Third Step: Self-Protection with Handguns clink on these links)

Copyright © 2009 Kym Lambert

Self-defense and acquaintance rape

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One of the myths I’ve seen about women’s* self-defense has been that it is only effective if the attacker is the “stranger in the ally.” I’ve heard this, even, from some self-defense instructors which is truly sad (not the really GOOD ones, though), but it’s most often heard from those giving reasons why it’s pointless to bother to learn to defend oneself. It’s usually the main reason, even, going along with “it’ll make you take too many risks” and “a small woman with training is never going to beat a big man if he is trained too.” The theory is that as most rapes and other assaults against women are committed by dates, long-term boyfriends, husbands, family members, supposed friends, business associates that either women are going to be unable to use such methods against someone they know and possibly care about and/or most of these assaults are really violent enough to warrant the abilities gained in self-defense training.

Why do these naysayers believe that a woman trained in self-defense is going to be unable to use it on a man who they know just because they know him? This seems to go back to the “nice girls don’t hurt anyone” belief, that it’s innate in our being as women not to cause anyone physical damage. However, we probably could, apparently, learn to hurt the unknown stranger in the dark alley. But never, ever, ever the guy that thinks he can hurt us even if he knows us.

I believe that part of self-defense training is that we learn that anyone who causes us harm is someone we can hurt in order to prevent ourselves from being hurt. It doesn’t matter if we know him or not, if he’s hurting us we have to get over any notion that we can’t hurt him. This must be part of the process. Even if, ESPECIALLY IF, the abuse is long term.

But the notion that “date rape” and other acquaintance rape and abuse doesn’t get violent has struck me as totally odd. Because battery and rape are always hand-in-hand. Yes, some date rape happens with only verbal coercion, but if that doesn’t work it can quickly escalate. Even some situations where consensual sex is intended by the woman, things become violent…as is the case of someone I know whose date found himself on the floor after letting her know she had no choice in the matter, he liked it rough, on the woman, and fully intended to hurt her. She had full-impact training and she was not the one in the most pain by the time she walked out the door. (Remember, you can say “no” even after you said “yes,” ANY time you no longer, for any reason, want to continue.)

Even in the most “charming” coercive behavior there is that threat that things could “get ugly” if the woman doesn’t go for it. Many women who gave in to verbal demands, with no overt violent threats, have noted that even without it being stated they were afraid of being physically hurt if they didn’t give in. In fact, I’d say nearly all. That “I’d be helpless if it got that far, he’s bigger and stronger” message that is so prevalent in our society.

By having the knowledge that they have the ability to fight back if the man turns violent, women may be more confident in their “nos.” Many times it probably will end there, other times perhaps they’ll have to actually use those skills. But they’ll have them. And either way, they’re more likely to come out of it not having been raped.

Which makes me wonder…is that the sort of “risks” we’re not supposed to want to take? Being more confident in the things we’re doing, around the people we are with? I think if those are “risks” they’re more than well worth taking.

*I’m maintaining the language that “he” is the attacker and “she” is the potential victim in part because this is a blog about physical feminism and mostly because these are still the higher odds. This is not meant to negate in any way that women are abused by other women, men by women, men by other men…or any possible combination. We do still live in a world where women are considered weaker, men stronger and this is the basis of much of the abuse women face from men and why the odds are still in favor of this mix. Physical feminism, in fact, seeks to remedy that by empowering women to find their physical strength….we do have it!

Copyright © 2008 Kym Lambert

Thoughts on Weapons

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A recent post on one of the SCCS fora about women and guns got me thinking about weapons and self-defense over all. Okay, I usually think about this a lot, but the past few days I’ve been thinking more about alternative energy and preparing for this coming winter instead.

When it comes to self-defense the first weapon is the brain. Train it. It really all comes down to knowing what you need to do and not letting your brain get in the way when the shit hits the fan. You need to be aware of what is happening, what dangers exist, what escapes exist, what methods will work and, very importantly, you have to not let your brain freeze you trying to sort it out. Which means you need to know how to get your brain to do this automatically, so it doesn’t seem like a list of things to follow and instead all happens at once. And, if it comes down to it, your brain does have to get out of the way of the body when it has to do it’s thing.

As it doesn’t always have to “come down to it” remember that talking your way out is a good strategy when ever possible. So you must train your brain to read people not only to recognize threats but to find ways to dissipate threats that are happening. Conversational skills may not get you out of every situation, but they’re not something to be dismissed as old fashion. If nothing else, they can buy you time, they can help you find weaknesses and it doesn’t hurt in court if you say you tried to talk your way out first but were left with no choice but to do physical damage.

I’m not going to say “use your brain to avoid all dangerous situations.” I actually hate that most “self-defense” advice tends to still start with this, even in an age where we have finally acknowledged that one of the most dangerous places for a woman can be her own home. And we do have a right to choose to do things and go places that might not be deemed safe, especially when we consider no place 100% is. Instead, I think it’s important to always realize what dangers you face in any situation, in any location. If you choose to go to a isolated parking garage do it with your brain in gear, know what/who is around you, see everything you can, know where your best bets for safety are and know that you may well have to fight if the wrong person is in that van over there. And know how to.

Your second weapon is your own body. Train it. I think that full-impact self-defense training is vital for everyone, especially women and children. We need to know how it feels to hit full force, both so that we know that we are when we are but also to see what it can do. Martial arts training is great for long term conditioning of both body and mind for fighting, but it often involves NOT hitting other people full-force. I believe the best course is to combine full-impact self-defense, with refresher courses, and combat focused martial arts, but if you choose to only do one do the full-impact self-defense course. And practice it at home…preferably with a bag and not an unprotected friend. Think through the scenarios you are taught, get the body comfortable with the moves, practice them. Practice, practice, practice. And get the brain to stay out of the way!

Like any weapon, you should also keep your brain and your body in the best condition you can if you are going to depend on them. Yes, this means avoiding overindulgence in mind altering, which also affects the body, substances if you feel you may need that brain to protect yourself. It also means staying in shape. Getting and staying strong and fast enough to use what you learn, whether it’s striking or running.

Now we come to other weapons. I’m all for carrying and keeping in the home legal weapons for self-defense. No matter how smart and strong we are, we’re not always dealing with bare-handed assaults and being armed ourselves is a right we must practice and fight for. Whether you choose guns, knives, pepper gas, blunt weapons or a combination, the first rule is know the damn weapon! Like the brain and body, it takes practice and more so because it’s not been a part of you before. Keep it/them in good condition.

Weapons are all around you, I refer to them as weapons-of-expedience, just let your brain find them and your body use them. Anything you can pick up, or even shove, can be used to defend yourself. Anything. I once used shampoo (having years of sensitization to the idea of being attacked in the shower.thanks to watching Psycho at a young age …it turned out to be a prank by someone who was particularly stupid). A regular mental exercise for me is to walk into a room, identify all exits, inventory all people there if any and inventory the weapons-of-expedience all around. What can I throw, what can I hit with, what can I pin someone down it, what can I drive through someone. How fast can I get to each object before others in the room, what would be the best way to weld it, how much strength will it likely take, what might it do to the human body. And, of course, at home and when otherwise able, I practice with various objects so I actually have some idea of the answers to these things imprinted on my body.

If you do have a third weapon, do not forget the first two weapons. You need to be very sure that the brain can handle the weapon you choose. No matter how good a shot you are are, a gun is not going to save your life if you realize you can’t shoot someone when the shit hits the fan. Deal with this possibility, the reality of what it would mean, think it through, BEFORE you get the gun. Just because you feel you can’t, however, doesn’t mean that you can’t change that. If you want to have a gun for self-defense but feel you might hesitate to shoot someone attacking you, find ways to train your brain to over come this issue. Or find a different weapon.

Also remember that you will not have any other weapons but your brain and body with you at all times. Therefore continuing your physical training so that you can use just your body or weapons-of-expedience if your weapon(s) is/are not with you or if you have to fight to get to them. Also be prepared that in tight quarters the advantage of some weapons may be loss unless you are able to fight to maintain control and possession of them.

What ever you choose, it is the brain and the body that will always be with you. Treat them well, keep them sharp.

Copyright © 2008 Kym Lambert